Well, I’m someplace I never thought I’d be, a psychiatrist’s office. I’m here waiting for my son, Connor, who has just dropped out of college (forfeiting a full acting scholarship), lost 50 pounds in two months and looks haunted and hollow, as though he is on drugs. He barely speaks above a whisper and has developed odd eating behaviors.
I am worried and scared. I don’t understand what is happening, but I hope the psychiatrist has answers. The diagnosis: recurrent major depression, generalized anxiety disorder, social phobia, and maybe OCD. Medication should fix this according to the psychiatrist.
Connor tries taking classes at UAS but drops out again. He is ultimately given eight to ten different medications in differing combinations, none of which seem to help much. Connor starts seeing a therapist for talk therapy in addition to the psychiatrist.
My son is falling apart. There is guilt – did we cause this? There is no family history of mental illness or known traumas. There is grief – all the dreams we have had for Connor’s future and his own dreams for his life are gone, replaced by the unknown.
How do I deal with this? Nobody talks about mental illness. No one offers to mow your lawn, bring you dinner, clean your house as they might if your child is diagnosed with cancer. No one holds a fundraiser to help pay for the high cost of treatment that isn’t covered by insurance (assuming your insurance will cover anything).
Looking back now, I don’t remember how I discovered NAMI Juneau and their Family-to-Family class. I do remember that by taking the class, I learned I was not alone. I was better able to understand what was happening with Connor. I learned how to better communicate with my son and how to talk to mental health professionals.
Ultimately, we were able to find the help that Connor needed, but it took years to find the right help, a common event when managing a mental health condition. Once in treatment, Connor worked hard to overcome depression and anxiety. It was not easy, but today he has completed college and is working in the profession that he loves: theatre.
I have become increasingly involved with NAMI Juneau over the years because I know how devastating and frightening it is when your loved one is deteriorating before your eyes. No one asks to have a mental health condition, but organizations such as NAMI Juneau can provide support, skills, and hope.
I would ask you to take a moment and remember NAMI Juneau in your charitable giving this year. Your donations directly support education, advocacy, and support right here in Juneau.
-Bonnie Chaney, Board Member, Volunteer Program Teacher and Presenter
You can donate online at namijuneau.org, click on Donate or securely donate here. No gift is too small and we thank you in advance for your support.
Wishing you and yours a wonderful holiday season!
Articles, Stories, and Tidbits on Living with Mental Illness 